World of Jenks: "Can't Make Me Be Me"

In the premiere episode of MTV's newest series World of Jenks Andrew lives with Chad, a 20 year old living with autism. While with Chad school, meets his friends, takes him to NYC (a mistake!), Coney Island, and dives into his life. This episode really opened my eyes to people with autism, at first I just thought autism only effected how people comprehend things, that maybe they were a little "slower" than everyone else, and had trouble socializing. But now I realize that there are many sides of autism and it can affect people differently. Chad suffers from hypersensitivity, which is common in a lot of autistic people. (New fact to me!) I didn't think much of it at first, but his hypersensitivity is what made his trip to NYC a bummer. If you've never been to the city, or don't know much about it (.....!), New York City is a very loud, and busy place. With car horns constantly honking, and the usual bustle of city-dwellers, Chad found it extremely difficult to enjoy his visit, and they ended up cutting the trip very early. I couldn't imagine living with that, not just because I love the city! But because it can totally make or break the moment. Think about all the places that are loud: sporting events, concerts... you couldn't be able to enjoy any of them!

Chad was also very agitated when without his camera. It almost ruins the whole outing for him, when he wasn't able to capture memories of him and his friends at lunch. Even when Andrew offered him his own camera, it wouldn't satisfy him. Also, Chad had a very meticulous evening routine, before he went to bed. Even when his mother moved something slightly, it set him off. When I think about those kind of situations, people with severe OCD pop into my head, but I never knew that people with autism could be in the same boat.

If you didn't check out the show, I really think you should. So far, World of Jenks has gotten a big approval from me, and apparently a lot of people!! It was the most watched premiere in all of MTV history. After going on mtv.com today to watch this episode, I realized that there is indeed another episode entitled "Heaven and Hell" where Andrew lives the life of the rapper, Maino. So, expect a review of that shortly!!

xoxo

P.S. My parents who normally "frown upon" MTV shows, enjoyed this one! So if you're worried about content, (cursing aside) World of Jenks seems pretty good!

Song stuck in my head today: "My Brain is Hanging Upside Down" by The Ramones

Keep on keepin' on,

Madison

Don't Like MTV? Hopefully This Will Change Your Mind

Alright, there's this new show on called World of Jenks and I'm dying to watch it! It looks SUPER good, and it (officially) premieres tonight at ten o'clock on MTV. I know, I know. They showed a sneak peek after the VMAs last night but I didn't stay up to watch it so I'm planning on watching it tonight or catching both episodes on mtv.com ☺

World of Jenks takes you literally, into the world of young documentarist (huh?) Andrew Jenks. For a week, Jenks moves in with a different person to experience their life. In the first 2010 season, the episodes follow him as he uncovers the life of a NFL cheerleader, rapper, cagefighter, homeless girl, and more. I really hope this show is as good as it seems from the commercials and promotions I've seen and I hope you all check it out! I love documentarys so I think I'll enjoy this.

Leave a comment if you are going to or have watched the show! Prepare for my review and a post about The Buried Life next week!!!

Song stuck in my head today: "Walk This Way" by Aerosmith

Keep on keepin' on,

Madision

Not sure how you could forget..

I've always approached what happened on September 11th 2001, in a very weird manner. I can cry and cry watching videos about the Holocaust, thinking about war, reading a murder mystery, or even turning on the news. But something weird hits me when I think about 9/11. The tears get jammed and I suck in my cheeks and clench my fists, as if I'm preparing for someone to punch me right in the gut. I don't know why.

I think it takes anyone a while to wrap their heads around an idea that they didn't create or an event that they weren't there to witness or be a part of. But only now, nine years after the towers were struck down, do I think I'm finally beginning to understand what occurred on that September morning. Maybe it's because my teachers have seemed to avoid it in class, and it hasn't been drilled into my head like the Holocaust or the Vietnam War, or even a small murder like the one of Emmet Till. All I know is that I've always had a hard time grasping what happened on 9/11.

So, today I watched a bit of the memorial on T.V. and that I think, helped me finally realize what tragic things happened and how horrible they really were. I turned on the memorial just as Mayor Bloomberg made his speech, and the moment of silence at 8:46 occurred. During that moment, my mind wasn't silent. I made myself picture a plane striking a building. A building that seemed indestructible and intimidating from my perspective as a mere human. A building holding hundreds of people, people who had daughters, sons, wives, husbands, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, and friends to get home to. People who came to work knowing it just as another day of work, and nothing else.

That hit me.

After a few more words from the Mayor and other significant people, they began to list the names of those who died at the World Trade Center.

That hit me more than anything.

I watched them recite the names slowly, one at a time, stopping to speak about their loved ones, and after what felt like an eternity, I realized: They're only in the A's. At that point, I started bawling and headed up in my room to change my clothes and get ready for the day because I knew my Dad would want me to help him out with my sister soon. After a hour and a half, I got back downstairs. They were just starting to recite the names of those who died that last names started with a D. I don't know how long it took them to say all the names, I couldn't watch for that long because I had a busy day ahead of me. But I watched most of it from the As to the Hs. There was a girl who died, she was two. I looked at my little sister when her name came across the screen, she was playing with her toys, sitting on the floor oblivious to anything real. I imagined her with only one more year left to live, and I never want to have to imagine that again.

I didn't loose anyone on 9/11. But my heart goes out to those who did. I was too young at the time to have memories of it now or to even have known what was going on at the time. But I'm glad I'm finally realizing the horror of what happened that day, and how many lives it touched.

I found this photo online when I ran a Google image search. Someone posted them on their blog, and the reviews were very mixed. I thought I'd put this photo instead of some of the more graphic ones I found, because I thought this one was interesting and thought provoking. I think they're just stupid. What's next? A Hiroshima doll? But... some people liked them! Beats me.

This week my sister and I caught the tail end of a special on the History channel about 9/11 conspiracy theories. I found it really interesting while I don't believe in any of it! But it did open my eyes do a new way of thinking... I guess. :p

Song stuck in my head today: "Working on a Dream" by Bruce Springsteen

Keep on keepin' on,

Madison

Back to Basics: A Flower List Update

(I have to ask you it now!) Have you ever sent fan mail?

25% said No.

0% said Yup!

50% said Um, why would I?

25% said I've thought about it.

0% said I want too.

If you haven't read my other post about me sending fan mail, as a part of my Flower List, I asked you all to comment if you've sent fan mail, no one did (*cry*) so I made it a poll! That's basically it. Not much to elaborate on, but no I really feel pathetic looking at the poll results. Why did I even put that on the list?

Thank for reading (: I'm trying to decide what I should try to tackle next... any suggestions? (Psh, not like you guys comment anyways anymore!! Haha)

Song stuck in my head today: Hasn't snuck in yet

Keep on keepin' on,

Madison

Time Just Goes

So, first two days: OVER.

(I would've written right away about my first day, while it was still fresh (ha...) in my mind, but I had my first soccer practice and then I was pretty busy with school supplies and what not afterwards!)

Teachers? Never thought I'd say it but- I miss my old ones! Even the ones I thought were stupid or boring, I miss 'em!

Hallways? Not as bad as they're cracked up to be, thought getting on/off the stairs and turning around can pose a problem sometimes.

Lunch? Perfect!

Soccer? Fine so far ☺

Upperclassman? Except for the cries of "FRESHIES!" "Hey freshmeat." "Move it freshman." "Oh sorry, they're freshman!", everythings cool.

Locker? After five or six tries on the first day, and asking random students to open it for me, my locker can now be opened on the first or second try by yours truly! Wonder why it took me longer in high school than middle school to get used to this lock...?

Classmates? So far, a lot of my friends are in my classes so I'm really content with that. Art though? That's another topic...

People? Uhm, can that go in the other topic section also? Okay, thanks.

Homework? Fine, but then again, it's barely the end of the first week.

Waking up? Yoga helps ☺

So, there you have it in a nutshell. Wanted me too elaborate? Yeah, me too! So here's my other thoughts on the day, if it's too much for you just skip to the end and check off what you thought!!
When I walked it the school, I'd thought it'd be like WOW. Throughout the day, I just thought I'd be surprised with every turn of the hallway and it'd be like I walked into a movie with every class. But it wasn't. It was like, Oh, wow! I'm here... . But I guess that's just me expecting too much out of everything like normal. My friend Steven said, "What do you expect? People to start dancing and singing in the hallways like High School Musical?" No. But, admittedly, I tried that! Just to spice up my day I guess. My friend started singing "Good Morning Baltimore" and there you have it: me singing the chorus on my way to English hoping that was the mixing ingredient. I don't know what I want, but I know I want it, y'know? Ha, I make no sense. But hopefully, what ever it is that is "missing" I will find soon! I keep telling myself that a lot can change in a year, and well, a lot can!

As for the people, I sometimes wanna throw up. I know it just sounds like and angsty teen but I really wanna get out of this town! I can't believe I just said that, but I did. Whenever I see my friends Facebook statuses as "Get mee outta heerre!" or "God I hateee this town" I just make mine as "I know it sometimes can stink, but you only have four more years so make the most of it! You're gonna miss it later on". That's all very well and true, but sitting in art today inside I was screaming GET ME OUT. Not just because of that class (again, another story) but because I was starting to wonder if I'll ever meet people that I just know I wanna hang out with, people that I don't have to worry about this or that with, people that I know won't find me weird or say: Oh you're so artsy and different! (which is nice to here, but I'm really not that different!). Okay, maybe that's a lie. I have good friends, I don't know what I'd do without mine, and I would love new people in my life, but friend-wise I'm at a very good place! Maybe I'm avoiding something. Yeah, I am. I really don't know if I wanna mention it though. I'm totally unsure. You know what I'm talking about. It starts with a B, and I think that's what I keep looking for but turn up with Eminem tracks, flat rim Mets hats, Nike sneakers, and Playboy magazines. But, like I keep hoping and praying...

A lot can change in a year.



Song stuck in my head today: "Chicken Fried" by the Zac Brown Band

Keep on keepin' on,

Madison

Time To Start FRESH

You take a deep breath

And you walk through the doors

It's the mornin' of your very first day

You say hi to your friends you ain't seen in a while

And try to stay out of everybody's way



It's your freshman year

And you're gonna be here for the next four years

In this town

Hopin' one of those senior boys

Will wink at you and say you know I have'nt seen you around before





High school seems like SUCH a big deal. I guess it is. Just now that it's here, I'm starting to wonder why. Some of my friends in high school don't think much of it, but maybe they're just playing that "I'm a too cool teen" card. But some say it's the best four years of your life, so I'm thinking well what if I just so happen to mess those four years up?! I mean, what makes them sooo great anyways? Time will tell....

Am I nervous? Yes. I'm nervous that the upperclassman will be mean, I'm nervous that I'll have trouble finding my classes, I'm nervous my teachers will pile me with homework, and I'll only get worse with my soccer skills. I know this can't all happen, but still, fear is fear. It's there.

So I hope you're school year starts well! Wish me luck ♥

Song stuck in my head today: "Fifteen" by Taylor Swift

Keep on keepin' on,

Madison

Life's Just One Big To Do List

there's 104 days of summer vacation and school comes along just to end it
so the annual problem for our generation

is finding a good way to spend it...

If you read my other post about the summer ending, you know that I expected more out of this summer. And that's my fault. This Labor Day weekend, I felt like summer was just beginning, and yet I had to watch it slip right out of my fingers. I finally realized what I wanted to fill my long hot days with. So I made yet another list. A list of what I plan to do next summer. Yes, this defies my whole "live in the moment" philosophy, but if I don't write it down I'll just be repeating this next year. So, with that being said, it's time to reflect on the summer of 2010! As school starts tomorrow, think of the things you've done. Look back at your summer pictures, and read your journals. Show yourself that you actually did stuff this summer! Wheter it was what you wanted to do or not. Then, if you want, make a list like I did and put it away. Not somewhere where you'll forget about it, but somewhere where it won't be a constant reminder that you didn't get things done (although that might be a good motivation...!). Take it out next summer and DO. DO what it says, DO other things too and have the best summer ever!!! Here's some pictures from my summer ☺

my friends and myself at camp

my friends at camp dressed as superheroes!

my friends and me at camp again! (pay no attention to the lady behind us, hahaa)

2nd grade music class at camp

me on the boat tour of NYC, gah we felt like such tourists!

me wearing these cool Obama glasses i found in Chinatown!

my closest encounter with the Statue of Liberty. pretty amazing.

me and my best friend Jake, about to jump off into the bay

this has to be one of my favorite summer memories: picking berries in the rain with my cousins

my cousins and I fooling around in the bay ☺

BAY!

my friend Paige and me next to our snowman! (yes- somehow thanks to the universe we made a snowman in the middle of August)

me trying my best not to get shocked by the wire!

reelaxsayshun

my new friends down the block!

Wow. Posting all these pictures made me feel great. I actually did a lot of things this summer! And let us not forget my week stay in Iceland this July! I feel ashamed that I said I didn't do anything this summer.

Well, I hope you had a good summer and if you didn't, try to make the next one the best! For now, enjoy fall. I know I will! (Fact: it's my favorite season)

Song stuck in my head today: "Angel Dance" by Robert Plant

Keep on keepin' on,

Madison